"To learn vital skills that promote self-actualization."
This is one striking phrase that caught my attention when I was reading
the toastmasters international mission statement few years ago. It was a
bold and ambitious declaration to make; given that self-actualization
is one of those elusive things that mankind is searching and striving
for throughout his entire life. It has always been my wish to find the
answer to self-actualization.
To
provide a background to self-actualization, it was coined by humanistic
psychologist, Abraham Maslow in his hierarchy of needs as the highest
level of need possibly reachable by human being. Self-actualized
individuals have achieved a high level of emotional and psychological
maturity. They engage in work in which they have a strong passion for,
listen to and heed their own inner voice rather than others, have high
inner locus and dares to be different. Past studies of self-actualized
individuals find them to be highly creative and successful in their
domain of work, including Albert Einstein. As I explore further and
further into the depths of the toastmasters program and its role in
promoting self-actualization, I began to understand why the founder of
this program claimed as such.
I
shall not expound on the obvious benefits of this program such as
improved communications and leadership skills which is already evident
in the conduct of toastmasters worldwide.
Self-expression
Not long ago, when I was helping one of our members to prepare for her 1st few
project speeches, she told me that she is clueless about what to say.
She hasn’t got any idea. I then suggested that she speak on the subject
that she posted on her facebook wall, which I thought will make a really
intriguing and interesting speech topic. She replied, “No! this is
wrong to say in toastmasters!” It got me startled as I have no inkling
why she considered that as “wrong” ?
I
soon realize that it was due to the way we are being brought up and
educated that resulted in such a perspective. We live in a society where
we are so attuned to academic subjects such as maths and science that
has a definite answer on what is right and wrong. We constantly seek for
‘right’ answers and guidelines. We complain of a lack of creativity and
of ideas, but that’s because we impose a judgment on our own ideas
before we even allow it to blossom due to our deeply ingrained approach
of looking for ‘answers’.
I
also recall that I behaved the same way during my early stage of
toastmasters when I was always on the search of a ‘correct’ speech
topic. But in toastmasters, there is no right and no wrong thing to talk
about. It encourages flexibility and creativity in each other’s
speeches and we are free to think anywhere outside the box. In fact,
when I was preparing for the humorous speech contest, I came to the
realization that creativity is what matters most in crafting a winning
speech. With encouraging and supportive club leaders who are like
siblings to me, rather than authoritative figures, my creativity has
literally been free to soar. In toastmasters, there is no fail of
failure or embarrassment and hence, I am never afraid to showcase my
ideas. It is like an experimenting ground for me. However, without the
honest and affirmative feedback and inspiration from fellow members, I
would not been able to go so far as to even win a trophy. All these
factors make toastmasters a perfect breeding ground for creativity to
flourish.
Something
I always advocate for members to speak about something that matters to
them or which they are passionate about. In this noisy world where
everyone is dying to say their piece, there is no way someone who do not
have a vested interest, will want to listen to you, unless you are a
president or someone of high stature. Toastmasters serve as an outlet
for freedom of expression without any form of distraction. It allows for
self-expression, a major element of self actualization. It endows
commoners like us to have a voice to communicate our deepest intentions,
insights and inspirations to fellow members who are so keen to find out
about us.
Self-discovery.
Very
few of us can claim that we truly know what we want in life and the
meaning behind our own existence. Even if we do, how can we be sure
that those are really what we are meant to do? Knowing yourself and
living out the purpose of your life can be a meaningful and fulfilling
endeavor which brings true success in life. According to Chade-Meng Tan,
author of ‘Search Inside Yourself’ , one way to clarify your values and
higher purpose is to tell them to other people. The act of verbalizing
abstract thoughts makes them clear and tangible to ourselves. Susan Cain
is a toastmaster who went on the international stage at TED conference
to speak about her experiences and challenges as an introvert living in
an extroverted western society. As she verbalize her thoughts, she
became clearer of her identity as an introvert and held closely to it
despite all the external pressures to conform. Her TED video accorded 3
million views and her book on introvert sold like hot cakes. She not
only became the bestselling author after her speech, she also served as a
rallying point for all undervalued introverts around the world who
found solace in knowing someone is like them. Her purpose in life is
clear, she wants to empower introverts to find their own voice in this
noisy world and public speaking has helped her to achieve that.
By
now, you should have know that by joining toastmasters, you get access
to a huge community of 100 over clubs and few thousand members, many of
whom are working professionals who are successful in their career. These
toastmasters span a huge variety of jobs, ranging from bankers,
lawyers, teachers, entrepreneurs, trainers, speakers, managers and a lot
more. Imagine having to speak and listen to so many other toastmasters
about their inside stories in their respective industries! The product
of it is that you are aware of what it means to be in a certain job and
better- endowed to find out your own career path.
On
top of discovering yourself, you discover and appreciate more about
another human being. Think about it, is there any other platform whereby
you can listen to one another speak for a duration of minimally 5-7mins
? No. As mentioned earlier, the world is too noisy with everyone
wanting to offer their inputs. Our toastmaster of the year award winner,
Coen Tan pointed out that, “ Good public speaking is based on good
private thinking.” Toastmasters is a place where I have acquainted many
worthy and like-minded friends because I get to know them on a deeper
level after listening to their speeches. I also found friends with same
interests. The other day, a member was speaking about meditation which I
have been practicing for a while. So excited to get to know a fellow
meditation proponent.
Self-confidence.
Public
speaking has been surveyed as one of the scariest activity to be
engaged in, according to statistics. Once you have conquered and
mastered such a fear, what else can be tougher than that? Needless to
say, your level of self-confidence skyrockets in whichever endeavor you
embark on. There are countless appointments, roles, manuals and projects
in toastmasters program for you to undertake, such as organizing chair,
contest chair, project evaluator, so on and so forth. You can just keep
challenging yourself. With each successful attempt of every function, I
find myself more confident than whom I used to be. I remember a speech
by our District governor of education and training, Pradeep who
mentioned that he witnessed a lady from his club evolving from a shy
girl who murmurs to a confident woman who carries herself tremendously
well after completing CC manual. Think about it, if you can stand the
scrutiny of 50 other people looking at you and still calmly deliver your
speech for 10minutes while looking at each and everyone in their eyes
confidently ( which is what you will be able to do after your Project
10), what other activity intimidates you? You gain unprecedented
confidence in every aspect of your life. You become a “ I CAN DO IT”
person.
After
a long stint in toastmasters, I have finally comprehended the true
essence of this program and what it has done for me. I have pieced
together these 3 elements of self-discovery, self-confidence and self –
expression to find the path to self-actualization in toastmasters. I
hope you achieve self- actualization soon.
Cheers!
Yours truly
